Hindi Funny Jokes Sms

1) Dharam: Basanti in kutto ke samne mat nachna. Basanti: So now u gonna tell me what to do nd wat not to do.Urself using abusive language,wearing out of fashion clothes,clinging to old rusty chains nd doing nothing.Who d hell r u to order me? Gabbar play d DJ...!!!

2) Hum dua karte hain khuda se, ki wo aap jaisa dost aur na banaye, Ek hi to cartoon jaisi cheez hai humare paar, kahin wo bhi common na ho jaye...!!

3) Majnu ko laila ka msg nahi aaya, majnu ne 3 din khana nahi khaya. Majnu marne wala hai laila ke pyar me, laila baithi hai msg free hone ke intejaar me...!!!

4) Bazuo me dum rakhta hun, dil me gum rakhta hun, pata hai sms ayega tera, isliye DISPRIN hamesha sang rakhta hun. . .

5) Mat karo hasinao se pyaq,wo ankho se waar karth hain.Maine teri wali ki ankho me dekha hai, wo tujhse hi nahi mujhse bhi pyar karti hai....!!

6) Unki gali ke chakkar kaat kaat ke, hum kutto ke yaar ho gaye. Wo humare na ho sake, par hum kutto ke sardaar ho gaye

7) Do u know why god made spaces between our fingers? Ans:So dat sumday,sumbdy can cum,hold ur hand,n say, "LE BIDI PI"

8) Bas nazro se dekh liya hota, Bas nazro se dekh liya hota agar tamanna thi hume daraane ki, hum yu hi dar jaate,kya jaroorat thi muskurane ki?

9) WIFE : kyu ji! Jab bhi me aapke pass aati hu to aap Chasma pahen lete ho? HUSBANd : Doctor ne kaha hai jab SHIR- DARD aaye to Chasma pahen lena

10) Patni- Jante ho maine 20 somwar ke upwas kiye tab jakar tumhein paya hai. Pati- Ye sab nahi karti to kya hota. Patni- Tumse bhi koi gaya guzara milta

11) WIFE:SUNA HAY KAY JANNAT MEIN HUSBAND KAY SATH WIFE Ko NAHEEN REHNAY DETE HUSBAND:THEEK SUNA HAI.WIFE:AISA KYOUN?HUSBAND:ARAY PAGLI ISI LIAY TU USAY JANNAT KEHTE HEIN.

12) Man:Humare America mein War ho gaya hai Sardar:Humare India mein to roz hi war hota hai Man:wo kaise?Sardar:SomWar, MangalWar, BudhWar..!

13) Shadi me sardar bahut der tak khana kha raha tha.Dusre ne pucha kab tak khaoge?SardaR Main to khud kha kha k thak gayaa hu pr card me likha tha Dinne7 to 10pm

14) Napoleon: There is no such word as 'Impossible' in my dictionary. Santa: To dictionary dekh kar kharidni thi...!

15) Sardar:Shirt K Liye Badhiya Kapda Dikhana? SalesMan:PLAIN Me Dikhau?Sardar:Hawai Jahaaz Tak Jaane Ki Kya Jarurat Hai? Yahi Dikha Do na

16) Taxi Driver- petrol khatm ho gaya hai. Gadi aage nahi ja sakti.Santa- KOI BAAT NAHI, reverse lelo, vapas ghar chalenge

17) Ramu on cycle hit Lady accidentally..Lady: "Break Nahi Mar sakte Kya?"Ramu: "Poori Cycle he Marde ab Break kya alag se maru?"

18) Narad muni dharti par BEER pene aye,12 botal pilane k bad, waiter:Apko chadti kyu nahi? Narad:Main BHAGWAN hoon. waiter:Chad gayi SALE ko

19) 1 Admi Apni biwi se bola-Raja dashrath ki 3 raniya thi.Is hisab se main 2 shadian or kr sakta hu.Biwi-Bas itna yad rakhna k Dropdi k 5 pati bhi they.

20) A studnt atachd Rs.100 Note 2 his test paper & wrote Re.1 for 1 mark, Sardar was paper checker; He sent him Rs.66 back & wrote-U got 34 mark.

21) A lady was kissing a lion inside a cage in circus.Ring master- Can anyone do it? SANTA:-main aata hun par pehle sher ko to hatao

22) Wife to husband: see breaking news.. 80 yr old man ne shaadi kar li.Husband: sari umar samazdari se bitayi, akhri me bewakufi kar hi di

23) REPORTEr: Lalu Ji. The poor women in bihar dont have clothes to wear. LALU: U FOOL, Tum FTV dekhte ho? rich women bhi cloth nahi pehenti hai.Ye fashionwa hai.

24) Bhikari: Sahab ek rupya de do. Sahab: Tumhe sharam nahi road par khade hokar bheek mangte ho Bhikari: Abe tere ek rupye k liye office kholu kya

25) 1st sardar:yaar tum nay apni biwi ko talaq kyon di?2nd sardar:yaar woh bari character less thi shaadi mujh say aur bacha bhagwan say mangti thi

26) Ek bacha paida hote hi nurse se bola-mobile hai kya?Nurse:-hai pr tu kya karega Bacha:kuch nhi bs God ko miss cal krni hai ki me pahunch gya

27) A girl sitting in examination hall with sardar ji.. Girl- sardarji, mein tumhari nakal marloo..! Sardar- ahoo, tu meri nakal maar lay, fir mein teri asal maarta hu…

28) Pati Patni me ladai ho gai,Pati ghar se chala gya Raat ko phone karke pucha:"Khane me kya he Patni:zaher pati:me der se aunga,tum khakar so JANA

29) Sardar 1: mene apne bete ka naam america rakha hai.Sardar 2: kyu?Sardar 1: me duniya ko batana chahta hu ki me america ka baap hu...

30) teacher-osama ki 5 biwi & 20 bachche.lalu ki 1 biwi aur 9 bachche,to batao kaun achcha? studnt-score to osama ka zyada hai par strike rate lalu ka achcha ha